Toni’s Blog

“Marry you!”  Stu sat up in bed and stared at me, his eyes wide and disbelieving.  “Oh, Rita, love, you’ve got to be kidding!”

His cruel laugh seemed to echo around the impersonal motel bedroom.

“Marry you!”  Stu almost whispered it to himself as he leaned back against the pillows, his hands behind his head.

I couldn’t look at him.  I wouldn’t have been able to see him for the tears in my eyes anyway.  Suddenly I felt angry.  After all I’d been through.  After all I’d done – to be laughed at and treated with such contempt…

Carol had warned me right at the beginning, but I wouldn’t listen.  When I’d seen the poster of the band outside the Town Hall I’d fallen in love with Stu.

“He’s beautiful,” I moaned.  “And those eyes.  I bet he knows how to make a girl feel real special.  Oh, Carol, we’ve got to get to this concert.  No matter how much the tickets are.  I want to be there!”

“Well, I wouldn’t mind myself,” she laughed.  “You never know who you might meet at a place like that!  Plus I quite like the band.”

I laughed with her, knowing she was thinking about the boys who’d be going.  I wasn’t thinking of them though.  I was thinking of Stu and how I could get to meet him…

He was the drummer with a new band called Burnt Wood.  They hadn’t been around long, but they’d recorded one single and the music papers had a lot of good things to say about them.

When we got to the concert I was jumping with excitement.  All day I’d known something really great was going to happen and I was determined to help it along in any way I could.

“Calm down,” Carol kept saying.  “Hey, see those two boys over there?  They keep looking in our direction.”

She nudged me, but I didn’t want to look or get involved with any of the local boys.  I had my sights set higher – a lot higher…

When Burnt Wood finally started their set I thought I was going to faint with ecstasy. My whole focus was on nothing but Stu.  As far as I was concerned the rest of the band needn’t have been there.

My mind was working overtime.  How could I get to meet him?  I was determined to, and before many more hours had passed!

“Let’s go round the back door,” I whispered to Carol at the end of the concert.

She stared at me, puzzled.

“What for?”

“Don’t act dumb, Carol,” I said in exasperation.  I grabbed her arm and virtually dragged her out of the Town Hall.  “What do you think for?”

“Oh, you’re not starting all that again,” she groaned.  “Look, those guys haven’t got time for small town girls like us.  They’ve probably got girls back home anyway.”

“You might be small town, but I’m not,” I retorted.  “This is a chance I’m not letting pass me by.  Now, are you coming with me or not?”

I started to walk around the building to the back door where I knew the bands always parked their vans to load up the equipment.  I grinned to myself as I saw Carol run to catch me up.

“Just as long as you don’t hang around for ages,” she grumbled.  “I promised I’d be home by midnight and you know what my Dad’s like!”

We stood for over half an hour before the doors finally opened and a couple of the band came through carrying amplifiers.

“Can I have your autograph please?”  I asked quickly.  I recognised the lead guitarist and made for him.

He grinned at me and laughed.

“Sure, little lady,” he said.  “Just let me get this onto the van.”

When he came back I’d found a piece of paper and a pen.

“Are you playing here again soon?”  I asked.  I was half looking at him and half looking at the door hoping desperately for a glimpse of Stu.

“Not for a while,” Danny replied.  “But we’re over in Crossways next Thursday night.  The Old Barn.  Know it?”

“Oh, yes, I’ve been there before,” I lied.  “Might see you there then.”    I smiled at him.

“That would make a dull evening pleasant,” Danny said meaningfully.  “I’ll look out for you.”

“Okay,” I said lightly.  “I’ll be there.”

By the time he went back into the hall I was almost breathless with excitement.

“Wow!” I sighed.

“You’re not actually going, are you?”  Carol asked, wide-eyed.

“I most certainly am,” I told her emphatically.  “Coming?”

“No way!” She said, shaking her head.  “We’ll never get home from Crossways.  Anyway, my Dad’ll never let me go there.”

“So don’t tell him,” I laughed. “Oh, come on, Carol, you’ve lied to him before, and you’ll do it again. Tell him you’re staying with me the night, and I’ll tell my old man I’m staying with you.  They won’t bother checking up.  Just think of the good time we’ll have with the band.  Or are you chicken?”

I looked at her squarely, almost enjoying the way she was struggling with her conscience.

“Maybe,” she said finally.  “I’ll think about it, but let’s get home now.  I did promise.”

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